Blue Isn't a Color

   Blue isn't a color

Blue isn't a color

Its the reality of existence.

The lump of unrecognized chaos in your throat.

Blue isn't a color

Its hearing that voice in the back of your mind

The one that says stay in bed, it will all be fine.

Blue isn't a color

Its seeing the smiles and hearing the laughs

And knowing that nothing really ever lasts.

Blue isn't a color

Its fighting the urge to cry even on days that shine.

And carrying a burden that's never truly mine. 

Blue isn't a color

Its the calling of our name out loud

And not recognizing the voice

Seeing our face in the mirror 

And knowing this isn't our choice.     .

Blue isn't a color

Its the song we long to sing

But cant mutter the words without 

The fear of the memories that it brings.

Blue isn't a color  

Its carrying a quiet sadness, hoping someone doesn't say its too loud.

The world spinning your chaos closer to the ground.

Being hollowed out and expected to still be whole 

A quiet ache settling where hope should start to grow.

But Even though sadness visits; it doesn't own me

Joy was paused, but not ending.

I am blue, but still breathing..

Blue isn't a color, but it could be.